2016 has been a bit of a downer, for India and for the world too. We welcomed 2k16 with open arms and big smiles, full of new dreams and hopes. But the days, weeks and months wore on and the news -- some good, some not so good and some really bad -- dimmed our initial hope and fervour.
Now the year comes to a close and everyone has just one thing to say...
Delete your account, 2016.— Sahil Rizwan (@SahilRiz) November 9, 2016
And absolutely nothing worked.
Have we tried unplugging 2016 waiting ten seconds and plugging it back in?— dong solo (@dongwon) June 24, 2016
Amidst all that was going on, we fell back on humour -- a crutch, a balm, a way to step back, take stock and keep marching.
Here's a set hilarious desi tweets on Twitter that kind of sum 2K16 up.
This is one of the most fulfilling relationships I've had in in my life pic.twitter.com/wBF9CuvCG4— Bratticus (@bharatunnithan) August 6, 2016
2. ITNA SCIENCE?
India's new 2000 Rupee notes are amazing. I have actual footage of how the embedded Nano Gps Chip works. Please share widely on whatsapp. pic.twitter.com/2U7MCaphWW— José Covaco (@HoeZaay) November 11, 2016
3. Lo ab.
Modi just got sick and tired of everyone yelling "DO HAZAAR DO! DO HAZAAR DO!" in his face. So he just responded with "DO HAZAAR LO!"— GRV (@MildlyClassic) November 15, 2016
4. Would watch.
an indian thriller called "now as you can see" starring a dude called ravi pointing at the screen giving a powerpoint presentation for 3 hrs— crapo (@Creepowoman) May 16, 2016
5. Both are trippy.
Coke Studio pic.twitter.com/ZCOkILgerO— Shan (@klpe) August 29, 2016
Santa: What you want?— aman (@firkiii) December 25, 2016
Me: Wo bathroom ki light band karde aur wahan saamne se t.v. ka remote utha de bhai pls#ChristmasEve
Yaha logo ka roka ho raha hai, aur mere sath ab bhi dhoka ho raha hai.— BeingNita (@VinithaShetty) April 17, 2016
8. Just Indian things.
Hollywood - And the Oscar goes to— adrak (@ubercoolosis) January 10, 2016
Bollywood - And the Sansui Colors Stardust Pan Parag Amba TMT Saria AsliMasaleSachSachMDHMDH Award goes to
9. Mere paas Sushma hai.
Brother I cannot help you in matters of a Refrigerator. I am very busy with human beings in distress. https://t.co/cpC5cWBPcz— Sushma Swaraj (@SushmaSwaraj) June 13, 2016
10. Mommy things.
[my family stranded in desert w/o food]— Abhishek Madan (@abhishekmadan) January 3, 2016
[kind stranger finds, feeds us]
Me: thank you 🙏
Dad: thank you 🙏
Mom: yeh roti mein to maida hai
I have only seen people underwhelmed or overwhelmed, never whelmed properly.— Biswa Kalyan Rath (@kalyanrath) May 7, 2016
Just how boring is that book? pic.twitter.com/xzi07UTrwH— Gappistan Radio (@GappistanRadio) December 18, 2016
13. Yes, pls.
Pagli pyaar ho jaayega. pic.twitter.com/jBKDASslm9— Shantanu Basrur (@thefuzzface) July 24, 2016
No I'll still not act pic.twitter.com/KpM03lvaSs— dorku (@Dorkstar) February 19, 2016
15. Cannot unnotice.
Every time R Ashwin comes on to bowl, I picture him first taking off a Cognizant/Infosys ID card from his neck and handing it to the umpire— Bratticus (@bharatunnithan) April 9, 2016
16. Maine apne pacchis saal ke career mein aisa chamatkar nahi dekha.
*Kanpur*— Bakwas Rider (@BakwasRadio) May 26, 2016
Doctor comes out of operation theatre after 3 hours
"Mubarak ho, light aa gayi"
17. Ekdum same.
My attitude towards most things in life in one GIF pic.twitter.com/OCcuvuLE8Z— Sahil Rizwan (@SahilRiz) June 30, 2016
18. Honest Bollywood songs.
Didi tera dewar deewanaaaa— Peglet (@PedestrianPoet) April 8, 2016
Haye ram kudiyon ko kare sexually harass under the garb of archaic tradition giving his actions legitimacy.
Throwback to the day this dog didn't let a MSEB guy take meter reading so he took photo of the dog instead. pic.twitter.com/3J7jUyAJC7— Denver Ka Dhakkan (@tantanoo) August 19, 2016
21. Sabse upar hamesha.
Sharmaji ka beta pic.twitter.com/dBSHQ7xtMi— Wild Child (@ClassicallyWild) May 23, 2016
22. Kehdiya you're my Sonia.
When you are trying to concentrate, but guys in the back sing 'Keh do na Keh do na, You are my Sonia'. pic.twitter.com/afoCmL1Tyg— TheWeirdIndianGirl (@ZohaShaikh2105) August 4, 2016
24. Very smart.
You know what makes for a great surprise party?— Sorabh Pant (@hankypanty) February 25, 2016
Announcing it in a newspaper. pic.twitter.com/34mJGed9a7
25. Let that sync in.
iPhone auto backup pic.twitter.com/wpxSOKWogu— Sandhya Ramesh (@sandygrains) July 31, 2016
If we have to select one thing that we Indians make the best in the world, it has to be the glue for stickers on steel vessels.— Soumya (@soumyaBha_t) January 25, 2016
*At McDonald's*— Raunak (@MeraHandle) August 4, 2016
"Ek glass paani dena"
"Sir, agar usme burger, coke aur fries add karte ho to meal ho jayega. De doon?"
the capital of Boman Irani is Bmuscat Tehrani— Rega Jha (@RegaJha) February 22, 2016
29. Cannot unsee.
Hehe one Bengali friend pressed Ctrl + B to paste.— izzy (@abcdefu) April 30, 2016
[Domino's]— adrak (@ubercoolosis) September 28, 2016
Me: 2 extra chilli flakes dena
Delivery Guy: 5 lijiye sir 2 se kya hota hai
Me: 2 oregano dena
DG: Meri laash par se guzarna hoga
32. Every mom ever.
You are the writer of your own story. Your mom is the editor.— LordAnusHahaha (@TheVacuumHead) June 12, 2016
33. That dedication tho.
Lara's face— Bollywood Bakwaas (@Bollybakwaas) August 2, 2016
Lara: OMG I just swallowed saltwater! Im going to hurl!
Director: Keep acting!
Lara: Oh, the passion! pic.twitter.com/n1XbHkWIBW
Gabbar:nach basanti— Bakwas Rider (@BakwasRadio) April 12, 2016
Veeru:basanti in kutton k samne mat nachna
V:naaai basanti mat nachna
35. Salary kitni hai?
A group of relatives is called an interrogation.— amrtsh (@floydimus) January 5, 2016
Proof that Kerala is one of the most literate states in India. pic.twitter.com/0L33357t4C— Abhishek Madan (@abhishekmadan) February 25, 2016
37. Every goddamn time.
Me : *finally settles into bed*— Luv (@IamLuvK) November 27, 2016
Bladder : pic.twitter.com/5ui5iaElsA
39. Just Ranveer things.
Ranveer Singh comes home wearing absolutely normal clothes— organic adrak (@ubercoolosis) December 16, 2016
Family: Kya hua beta koi problem hai to bataao humein
40. Bhaiyya yeh dono side xerox kardena.
Welcome to Digital India. Bring a photocopy duly attested.— samit basu (@samitbasu) November 12, 2016
41. Tax pe tax, parag tax!
They forgot to add the Saali Bhookhi tax pic.twitter.com/SLu5skkMUN— Cathartic Screams (@Just_Screams) October 21, 2016
42. We are safe.
[Zombie Apocalypse in India]— First Last (@RoastedPapad) October 23, 2016
Zombie 1 - Lets eat people.
Zombie 2 - I am a vegetarian.
Zombie 3 - Bhai mein toh Jain hun.
Idli sambar— Anurag (@unurag) October 5, 2016
44. Are you an SS warrior?
WhatsApp: We added end to end encryption so no one else can read your chats— 🤓 (@krazyfrog) September 13, 2016
Everyone: *posts chat screenshot online*
WhatsApp: what the bhen
45. 2016 in a picture.
Sudarshan pattanaik paying a tribute to 2016 pic.twitter.com/3Yb7JEQe7D— frootifer (@Oinkoo) December 18, 2016
46. Best cure.
[patient has headache/cancer/AIDS]— adrak (@ubercoolosis) March 8, 2016
Relative: Dawa ?
70's Bollywood Doc: Aap inhe lekar kuch dinon ke liye kisi hill-station pe chale jaaiye
When you live alone with your husband & your father-in-law gives a surprise visit.. pic.twitter.com/dQkN9gt2m6— Arjun (@zoomphatak) November 21, 2016
nothing can escalate this quick.. pic.twitter.com/KNg4irT9eq— Arun Lal (@dhaikilokatweet) September 17, 2016
Calculation went wrong 😭 pic.twitter.com/xyOJx7NrPw— Godman Chikna (@Madan_Chikna) August 26, 2016
50. Captain cool.
Sakshi: surprise me— Sense of tumor (@dashhtweets) October 27, 2016
Dhoni: *throws Ziva into the cradle without looking*
This is weird and my mind is on a roller coaster ride from past 10 minutes. pic.twitter.com/GOoe7bLuL2— हम्बल-फूल (@shutchup) November 21, 2016
Facebook is not all that bad. pic.twitter.com/wbWdx0VkGU— Madhura (@PunsTurnMeOn) December 12, 2016
Pehle istmaal kare fir vishwasghaat kare.— Shakti Shetty (@Shakti_Shetty) June 14, 2016
54. Emo, kaam kare sirf 6 second mein.
When your day goes from bad to worse pic.twitter.com/BJI2EfQU51— ☭ kit kAt (@anj_rajan) August 3, 2016
55. Same to same.
A nail cutter is an object you'll find lying around everywhere all the time until you actually need to use it.— Mihir (@mihirmodi) July 30, 2016
so why is your dad's name Jackie? wait, don't answer that. pic.twitter.com/6FtQTMCjvg— POST MALLU (@nah_im_abdulla) July 29, 2016
Melania Trump constantly looks like she's seen you somewhere but can't remember where. pic.twitter.com/kEWURpOSj6— 🤓 (@krazyfrog) July 20, 2016
58. No no no!
Am I the only one who's seeing something else? pic.twitter.com/xpJucERcZn— Shashwat Singh (@monstershanu) June 26, 2016
RBI should just snapchat all their policies— Rounak Jain (@r0unak) December 21, 2016
60. Swipe right.
Bankrupt, middle aged, but tamil brahmin so still a catch pic.twitter.com/GgoG5xALi8— Bratticus (@bharatunnithan) June 17, 2016
Texted 'Get well soon' to a guy who's in coma and 'Happy birthday' to my crush. The guy replied 'Thanks'— P.R. (@pr_akash_raj) September 25, 2016
62. You're the selfie stick of your own destiny.
Solo foreign trip.— Rameez (@Sychlops) October 11, 2016
Bollywood: No-strings attached no holds barred fling with hot fellow Indian.
Reality: Koi mere photo kheech do yaar
63. Akele akele.
•Having Food in Restaurant.— Godman Chikna (@Madan_Chikna) September 23, 2016
Tax: Bhai akele akele?
•Watching a Movie.
Tax: Bhai akele akele?
•Having a drink.
Tax: Bhai akele akele?
64. Right in the feels.
Really good looking guy next to me opened Tinder. By god, buffet mein chicken tikke ke baaju baithne wali kaakdi ka dard samajh gaya.— PT (@peeteeonyou) July 9, 2016
Zucchini being sold in Delhi under some 'other' name. 😂 pic.twitter.com/64oYcTZ3UB— Abba Dabba Jabba (@OB_noxious) July 20, 2016
66. lUkin CutE PriYA.
...... pic.twitter.com/BH27lzjDit— Nirzary (@nirzary) August 23, 2016
67. Every time.
[Courier guy]— Suprateek Chatterjee (@SupraMario) August 26, 2016
"Sir please sign here" *hands me a touchscreen tab*
[I draw a house, river, mountains and 2 stick figures]
"Thank you sir"
68. Chal hot.
Last time when someone called me hot was when I was blocking a bengali girl's way in a metro.— SlyFy (@AristoTroll) August 31, 2016
You little shit. pic.twitter.com/NQw2HXGLJU— JaJaJa (@lolkthen_) September 10, 2016
Boss: Why were the sales so low in the last quarter?— Bhayanak Puppy (@BhayanakPuppy) September 14, 2016
71. Nahi karni shaadi.
Me: Brad and Angelina are getting divorced.— Kautuk Srivastava (@Cowtuk) September 20, 2016
Mom: Aur karo love marriage.
72. Important question.
Indian Quora pic.twitter.com/qCST6j6n5n— Bakwas Rider (@BakwasRadio) September 21, 2016
*Returns from World Tour*— Sagar (@sagarcasm) September 13, 2016
Mom - Ghar se jo paani ki bottle di thi, wo kahan chhod aaya?
74. *Checks wallet*
Apart from Urdu, a five star menu is probably the only time anyone reads from right to left.— Sahil Shah (@SahilBulla) April 26, 2016
75. Restart the modem.
What do you mean it's not working out? What are you, a Goa plan?— Soham (@rushingquark) March 30, 2016
76. Every exam ever.
When you don't know the answer to an exam question but you refuse to leave it blank. pic.twitter.com/Ozb3RsV0rx— Smoking Skills (@SmokingSkills_) December 23, 2016
Background mein dono Kaho Na Pyaar hai step Kar rahe hai pic.twitter.com/9jTu9IPVgn— Prathamesh Sawant (@maxprat) August 7, 2016
Matt Damon would have been rescued a lot earlier from Mars if he contacted Sushma Swaraj instead of NASA. pic.twitter.com/JEsVGOofop— Sand-d Singh (@Sand_In_Deed) October 15, 2016
79. Every time.
Online Shopping v/s Reality 😂— Anamika (@MiishNottyAna) April 9, 2016
What you order n what is delivered 😂 pic.twitter.com/SbBSinxQuv
Unlike Twitter, LinkedIn is full of positivity. People whom I have never worked with are endorsing me for the skills that I don't possess.— Aladdin (@Alllahdin) August 29, 2016
*before sex*— Pakchikpak Raja Babu (@HaramiParindey) December 11, 2016
Ratan : are you ready, baby?
Girlfriend : pic.twitter.com/uuH7nu19RJ
82. Amity crowd never disappoints.
amity university students poore time aise hi khade rehte hain kya background me? 😂😂 pic.twitter.com/EpMCOJPI3l— Maithun Legion (@Being_Humor) February 4, 2016
When you give up on your day job long ago and now just daring your boss to fire you pic.twitter.com/tc9KxyCLou— Tyrantasorus (@tyrantasorus) August 26, 2016
"Bhaisaab, deposit karna hai ki withdraw?"— Jas (@thehumblerider) December 7, 2016
"Line mein kyun khade ho?"
"Main desh ke liye kuch karna chahta hoon."
85. Paan Singh Tomar.
If WWE ever tours Kanpur, India. pic.twitter.com/zyLYi8ljKJ— Godman Chikna (@Madan_Chikna) April 4, 2016
How they treat you at government offices pic.twitter.com/KeTo0FAJhP— Piyush Jain (@PJ_CRACKER) February 25, 2016
87. Every Indian home ever.
When mom says dont walk abhi poucha lagaya hai. pic.twitter.com/LXELkHz9wW— Chika Pikaa Rikaa (@Simply_neev) February 10, 2016
Why subtitles?— Sharanya (@TheTinyWoman) May 27, 2016
Let me clarify to avoid anymore panic:— IGoHomeWithDog (@sidin) November 17, 2016
Old 500/1000 notes: Illegal but tender
Paneer: Legal but not tender
Beef steak: Tender but not legal
90. Me too.
Interviewer: What are your strengths?— dorku (@Dorkstar) May 22, 2016
iPhone 6S - Great camera— Pranav (@pranavsapra) September 8, 2016
iPhone 7 - 2 Cameras
iPhone 7S - 2 Great cameras
iPhone 8 - 3 Cameras
iPhone 8S - 3 Great cameras
iPhone 9 - CCTV
AC repair guys want me to specify the fault to register an online complaint but I can't find an option that says gad gad aawaz aa rahi hai— N (@ennwhee) August 23, 2016
93. We finally have the answer.
...Script se. pic.twitter.com/5E0Cmtzcor— Smoking Skills (@SmokingSkills_) December 22, 2016
Multiple choice question be like pic.twitter.com/vA3H1uK5vK— Chikoo (@TweetErrant) November 1, 2016
*Uber driver reaches girlfriend's elbow*— Ashish Shakya (@stupidusmaximus) November 24, 2016
Uber Driver: Haanji main clitoris pe aa gaya hoon.
*Crowd waiting for Coldplay*— Rameez (@Sychlops) November 19, 2016
*Lights go out*
"Mitron. SURPRISE MOTHERFUCKAS!!!!"
*An ATM on stage.*
*Crowd goes wild.*
client expectation vs budget pic.twitter.com/J6szIH8Vp5— Rounak Jain (@r0unak) April 27, 2016
Hottest scene in a Rajshri productions movie pic.twitter.com/916TtfVsbp— Cathartic Screams (@Just_Screams) January 31, 2016
(late 20s & living w parents)— crapo (@Creepowoman) December 24, 2016
me: mom we r out of eggs so i am going out to buy some
mom: soon u will b out of eggs that cannot be bought
100. Ab Dangal hoga.
Only a few fortunate people are blessed to age gracefully like Ratan. pic.twitter.com/dYIc9Q0Dev— Being Bing (@ya_jhakaas) December 24, 2016
Be nice, 2017.
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