28/10/2015 8:26 AM IST | Updated 15/07/2016 8:25 AM IST

7 Things Parineeti Chopra Is NOT

Hindustan Times via Getty Images
NEW DELHI, INDIA - NOVEMBER 11: Bollywood actor Parineeti Chopra during an exclusive interview for her upcoming movie Kill Dil at HT Media Office on November 11, 2014, New Delhi, India. (Photo by Shivam Saxena/Hindustan Times via Getty Images)

Parineeti Chopra recently said she supports gender equality and women's empowerment, but she is not a feminist.

Her statement left some of us confused. So in order to further elucidate her position, the Chopra camp has issued a list of things Parineeti is not:

1) Parineeti enjoys going from one place to another for work or recreation, but she is not a traveller.

2) While at work, she behaves in the manner of a fictitious character, usually by reciting scripted dialogue in order to entertain an audience, especially in a play, movie, or television show. However she is not an actress.

3) Parineeti is a relative of Bollywood superstar Priyanka Chopra, whereby they have both descended from a common ancestor -- such as a grandparent -- by two or more steps in a diverging line; but she is nobody's cousin.

4) Parineeti relishes her butter chicken and fish curry but has a morbid fear of being labelled a non-vegetarian.

5) Parineeti moves rhythmically to music, using prescribed, improvised steps and gestures, with considerable poise and grace, but she is not a dancer.

6) She often visits the stadium to watch a variety of competitive events such as cricket and individual sports. However, she will not go so far as to call herself a spectator.

7) Parineeti admits she comes from a line of primates going back 200,000 years, who are commonly known in scientific circles by their binomial nomenclature 'Homo Sapiens', but she is not sure if she's comfortable with the term human.

Parineeti Chopra's PR team plans to gift her a hard-bound book that contains a list of words arranged in alphabetical order, which provides information on each word, usually including (but not limited to) meaning, pronunciation, and etymology; something she can refer to during her media events. However they firmly maintain it is not a dictionary.

Disclaimer:Note to Alia Bhatt fans - This piece reflects a style of writing commonly known as satire in literary lingo. All attributions to Parineeti Chopra are a figment of the author's imagination.

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