Far be it for us to criticize something as great as sex. The perks are undeniable: It keeps your immune system humming along! It’s potentially life-giving! When you orgasm, endorphins and oxytocin are released that can put you in an amazing mood for a few days.
That said, sex isn’t the only great thing out there. There are comparable highs. Just look at all the “sex is great but...” tweets on Twitter. For instance, sex is great, but have you ever had your luggage be the first one out on the carousel at the airport? Oof, major turn-on.
Below, 29 little things in life that give sex a run for its money.
sure sex is great but have you ever caught an uber pool to the airport that didn’t pick up anyone else
— Matt Ford (@JMatthiasFord) October 13, 2017
sure, sex is great, but have you ever finished a long piece of work and quit a browser that had 35 tabs open
— Hannah Jane Parkinson (@ladyhaja) May 20, 2019
Sex is great, but have you ever done that thing where the scissors slide all the way across the wrapping paper?
— Kevin Fallon (@kpfallon) December 23, 2017
yea sex is great but have you ever been to a chiropractor?
— sarah schauer 🦂 (@SJSchauer) July 25, 2018
Sure sex is great but have you ever worked a customer service job and been able to put an abusive customer in their place without being reprimanded?
— dripped out muppet (@sweatpantspapi) January 30, 2019
Sex is great but have you ever had a really good fart after a long haul flight?
— Clementine Ford 🧟♀️ (@clementine_ford) September 10, 2018
Sex is great... but have you ever finally removed a popcorn kernel shell from your gums after 10 hours..
— Christian Blacc.. (@50shadesofblacc) February 13, 2019
Yeah sex is great but have you ever been in a elevator, seen someone running towards it and reached over to the Door Open button but hesitated for a spit second then seen the doors close and convinced yourself it was the universes decision that you should ride alone today.
— Kaya Scodelario (@kScodders) September 17, 2018
Yeah sex is great but have you ever lost your phone at an event and then actually had it returned to you
— Stephanie (@Plurprincess_1) September 12, 2018
Sex is great but have you ever watched the school bus take your kids away from you for the day?
— Dad and Buried (@DadandBuried) May 10, 2018
I know sex is great but have you ever been paid by a client within an hour of sending the invoice?
— Jord Riekwel (@Larkef) January 29, 2019
yeah sex is great but have u ever had a meeting canceled
— Flexington Ave Local (@Dr_TacoMD) February 28, 2019
yeah ...... sex is great but ....... have u ever been able to spell mcconaughey right on the first try
— hunter harris (@hunteryharris) March 11, 2019
Sure sex is great but have you ever discovered that you and someone else hate the same person?
— Phillip Henry (@MajorPhilebrity) April 19, 2019
Sure sex is great but have you ever unfollowed someone who you had a crush on that never liked you back?
— Eden Dranger (@Eden_Eats) June 2, 2019
Sure, sex is great, but what about when you let a bus pull out at a bus stop and the driver opens his little window and gives you a big thumbs-up
— Damon Green (@damongreenITV) June 5, 2019
Sure sex is great, but have you ever had your suitcase arrive first on a baggage carousel?
— Stansaid Airport (@StansaidAirport) August 31, 2019
Yeah sex is great but have you ever been at a Costco in a massive line for the register and a Costco employee gently puts his hand on your cart and gestures to a new cash register he’s opening and says, “I can take you over here.”
— David Chen (@davechensky) October 12, 2019
Sex is great but have you ever got to 5pm before realising you forgot to open Slack?
— I Am Devloper (@iamdevloper) September 3, 2019
Sure sex is great but have you ever said “no” to a customer?
— Angry Barman (@angry_barman) September 7, 2019
sure sex is great but have you ever known someone was a super shitty person and never trusted them only for everyone else to realize later
— corey kindberg (@coreykindberg) August 20, 2019
Sex is great but have you ever opened a 10pc Chicken nugget combo and discovered that the worker blessed you with an extra nugget.
— Honey 69 (@MissHoneyStress) October 16, 2019
Sex is great, but have you ever handed in your notice to a job that has shattered your mental health for months?
— Jonny (@Jonnyishh) July 19, 2019
sure sex is great but have you ever said “a mistake on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine” directly to someone
— Well Caroline have the lambs stopped screaming (@ms_creilly) September 8, 2019
Yeah sex is great...
— Da Hubby (@kidnoble) October 1, 2019
...but have you ever worn your AirPods with no music playing to avoid talking to people and it worked?
Sex is great but have you ever ordered clothes online and every single piece fits right ?
— Tellie (@Chaantellie) October 7, 2019
Sure sex is great but have you ever accidentally taken a photo of yourself & it looks GREAT. pic.twitter.com/DiDwovmHX3
— Heatherbaby (@HeatherisHungry) October 16, 2019
Yeah sex is great but have you ever checked your bank account and had way more money than you expected
— zach (@Zachidc) December 30, 2018
Yeah sure, sex is great, but: pic.twitter.com/oyBuG3zcH5
— Spuke 👻 (@lukeacl) October 20, 2019