This post is dark and full of spoilers.
And now our watch has ended.
After eight seasons, 73 episodes and one melted throne, winter is finally over — Game of Thrones has reached its conclusion. And like Tyrion (Peter Dinklage) walking through the rubble of what Daenerys (Emilia Clarke) left of King’s Landing, it’s time to assess the aftermath.
Here’s what happens at the end of Game of Thrones:
HBOThe "Game of Thrones" series finale turned into the family reunion from hell when Queen Daenerys Targaryen, First of Her Name, Breaker of Chains, Fan of Frappuccinos, was killed by her nephew and lover, Jon Snow/Aegon Targaryen (Kit Harington).
As Ramsay Bolton (Iwan Rheon) once said, "If you think this has a happy ending, you haven't been paying attention."
Through almost eight seasons of the show, fans had cheered for the dragon queen as she rose from an abused, scared child to a Khaleesi set on reclaiming the Iron Throne, the birth right that was taken from her.
That was prior to Season 8, Episode 5, however.
There was no coming back after Daenerys torched King's Landing in the penultimate episode, seemingly unnecessarily killing thousands upon thousands of innocent people after the city had sounded its surrender bells. After that, it was only a matter of time before the bell tolled for her.
Following the destruction of King's Landing, Daenerys talked about liberating the rest of the world, and Jon just couldn't be cool with it. He told her she would always be his queen before stabbing her in the throne room with a dagger.
In the game of thrones, all men must die. But Daenerys was not a man. She was the Mother of Dragons. R.I.P.
HBOEveryone predicting there would be no throne in the end, you win.
Following Dany's death, her last dragon, Drogon, arrived in the throne room and, rather than doing anything to Jon Snow, just took out his anger on the tacky furniture. Like many had predicted, Drogon melted the throne. He then picked up his mom's body and flew out of sight.
HBOBran's (Isaac Hempstead Wright) been one of the confusing characters of "Game of Thrones" in the final season. Instead of imparting any of his endless knowledge on the people around him, he's just used his infinite powers to troll Jaime Lannister (Nikolaj Coster-Waldau) and fly around in some ravens without telling anyone the information he's gathering.
But uselessness be damned. Following a council to decide who will rule Westeros, Bran was elected king.
The outcome was heavily hinted at in Episode 4 of the final season. In that episode, following the victory against the army of the dead, Bran told Tyrion he doesn't "want" any more. Later Varys (Conleth Hill) told Tyrion the best ruler is someone who "doesn’t want to rule."
If anything, you've just got to be impressed with Bran for implementing that "Survivor" strategy of just coasting around and doing nothing then winning it all at the end.
HBOThings were just a lot simpler when Jon knew nothing.
Jon revealing the truth of his parentage to Daenerys, that his father and mother are really Rhaegar Targaryen and Lyanna Stark, and that he's the heir to the Iron Throne, was one of the catalysts that drove the Mother of Dragons to burn King's Landing.
After he became the Queenslayer, Jon was eventually sent to the Wall as punishment. There, he was reunited with Tormund (Kristofer Hivju) and finally (finally) petted Ghost.
Tormund seemed to foreshadow this would be the outcome for Jon in Episode 4 when he told him he has the "real North" in him, and Jon talked about wanting to go North with the Wildings. Well, you got your wish, bud. Hope it works out for you.
The final shot is Jon traveling with the Wildlings, possibly going the route of "Dexter" and becoming a lumberjack beyond the Wall.
HBOOf all the hot takes about the "Game of Thrones" ending, none will be hotter than that of Tywin Lannister, whose worst nightmare comes true in the finale:
Tyrion is what's left of the legacy of House Lannister.
He started out on the show drinking and knowing things, but as time went on he seemed to do less and less of both. Tyrion's character was one of the biggest victims after the show surpassed George R.R. Martin's books around Seasons 5 and 6. Over the final seasons of the show, he continually made poorer and poorer decisions, even to the point where he trusted his sister Cersei (Lena Headey) to send the Lannister army north to fight the undead.
However, like so many white guys before him, Tyrion failed up. Despite all his bad decision making over the final seasons of the show, Tyrion ended with a cushy office job, Hand of the King to Bran.
HBOShe's the queen that was promised.
Sansa (Sophie Turner) knew what she was doing when she revealed the truth about Jon's parentage to Tyrion in Episode 4. The information spread like dragon fire in King's Landing and eventually caused the downfall of Daenerys Targaryen, putting the Starks in control of Westeros.
Now, after eight seasons of being beaten, broken and ignored at every turn, Sansa ended "Game of Thrones" as the ruler in the North, now an independent kingdom.
For Northerners, lemon cakes are coming.
HBOArya's gone from an innocent girl shooting arrows to a Faceless assassin to the person who jumped off of an invisible trampoline to kill the Night King and save humanity.
She's done all there is to do in Westeros. Now, she's ready for her next adventure.
A girl left the Six Kingdoms to see what No One has ever seen.
HBOGrey Worm (Jacob Anderson) is over all this nonsense about Jon being pardoned after killing Daenerys. He takes the Unsullied and sets sail for Missandei's (Nathalie Emmanuel) old hometown, Naath.
But, since Martin's books say there could be some deadly butterflies there, our guy should probably pack some bug spray.
HBOAt Lord Commander of the Kingsguard, Brienne of Tarth (Gwendoline Christie), spent some of the finale filling out Jaime Lannister's Facebook profile in the Kingsguard White Book, which tells of their great deeds.
At Master of Coin, the new Lord of Highgarden, Ser Bronn of the Blackwater (Jerome Flynn).
Samwell Tarly (John Bradley) gets as close to being a wizard as he probably ever will, becoming a Grand Maester.
And Ser Davos (Liam Cunningham), the Onion Knight, is now Master of Ships.
Tyrion is, of course, Hand. And Bran the Broken -- they really need to work on that name -- is the final winner of the Game of Thrones.
Long may he reign.