Full-time Sustainability Professional. Part-time Writer.
Neha Simlai is a full-time Sustainability Consultant and works on mainstreaming ESG risk in the Finance and Retail sectors with a view on specific commodities. When she isn't working Neha struggles through a contested divorce petition, drinks Tea or Scotch depending on the time of day and comments on the many goof-ups of life, love, religion, the system, et al. She writes often, but not regularly and is currently working on her own book.
A complete stranger recently messaged me on Facebook to say that a post from my series, 'The Predictable Cycle Of Divorce', had helped her somewhat, as she was thinking through her divorce. But her situation is completely different. There is a four-year-old involved and that changes a lot of things. A friend reached out in person to say that I was getting a bit repetitive in setting the context and that most people who were going through a divorce end up dealing with it in whatever way they know best.
Things that are the most irksome and troubling during the process of separation and divorce are often based around what other people are speculating or saying about you. To counter that feeling of being spoken about or being judged, we often put ourselves through more than we should -- more emotional drama, more victimisation, more martyrdom, more conflict, more pain, more pressure and sometimes even more violence.
09/04/2015 8:09 AM IST
In the chaos that surrounds a divorce - the emotional upheaval, the financial assessments, the frenzied populating of the calendar, the sessions with the lawyer, the constant breaking down and picking up of the self, there is always a need for good friends, shoulders to cry on, "fix-it" people, crazies that will pull you back into the real world, time and again.
19/02/2015 8:15 AM IST
On most occasions, you think that lawyers are telling you stuff you already know. Sometimes they will say things you don't want to hear. Sometimes they will use legalese meant only to confuse you. They will also frustrate you with their lack of interest, wastage of paper, inability to stick to time, et al.
21/01/2015 8:21 AM IST
Strangely, enough, I continue to believe in relationships and emotional dependency. Honestly, I only hate divorce because the last casualty of the process of divorce is the person you were in that marriage--the one that believes in forevermore and happily ever after.
11/01/2015 8:29 AM IST
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