Who is my God? I am asked. It's a question I have never been faced with before and clearly, I am stumped.
It's never an easy task to explain your faith. Of course, indicating your religion with a single word in forms, or identifying it with a representation on your person is effortless. How does one explain one's God, one's faith? It is like trying to define love, seeking the ineffable to be caught in the warp and weft of words...that one has had me in a twist more times than one.
And here I am put on the spot to define my concept of my higher power. I try explaining that my God is amorphous. Sometimes he's merciful like Christ -- He who has doe-like eyes brimming with kindness. Sometimes she is Shakti -- resplendent like Lakshmi or fierce like Kali. Sometimes my God is the welcome warmth one experiences from looking at Nanakji, or resides in the mesmerising, uplifting feeling that comes from watching a whirling dervish romancing the cosmic alpha. Sometimes it's right here and now like the Earth or the gentle touch of the breeze, the refreshing caress of water --in any and every gift of nature I perceive this power. Sometimes it is the unstoppable burst of words from my pen that thrills and makes me feel so alive!
Sometimes it's a tremendously powerful orb of energy that shares its essence with love; sometimes it's the tell-all source that seems to make sure that I know, in more measure than the ordinary; it's the subtle call from the altar assuring comfort and completeness; it is that, which turns me inward; it is that which allows me to be quieter in absolute ease; it is that which accepts me as I am... warts and all! And so much more...
How do I describe my God? My experience is joyous as it comes bedecked in a new colour each day. A complete surprise, a reason to look forward, a new discovery, exulting in grace, an unfolding of me.
Yes, my experience of my higher power grows with every act of faith, every turn of my rosary, every silent chant, every fearless blowing of the conch! It gets stronger with every kindness extended and every kindness received with grace; it anneals with every challenging or fruitful day of work!
I cannot describe my God to you. You will have to know you and own you and you will know your own personal God!
PS: My god can also be found in the soft warmth of the quilt that envelopes me as I check out of questions and answers!