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9 Things We Get Wrong About Sex

9 Things We Get Wrong About Sex
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Size matters. You can’t get a sexually transmitted infection if you use a condom. Men have higher sex drives than women. Have you heard these common sexual assertions tossed about? Guess how many are actually true?

It’s harmful to believe generalizations, stereotypes and hearsay about sex and sexual health, and researchers are learning new information about it every single day. Remember there are so many different kinds of sexual experiences, preferences and desires, as well as human biology to consider when it comes to weighing myth versus fact.

Don’t worry if you aren’t yet an expert on orgasms and intercourse. Below, experts clear up the most common sex-related myths they hear perpetuated:

Myth: You can’t get pregnant on your period.

It’s rare to get pregnant on your period ― but that being said, there’s a caveat, according to Dr. Christine Greves, an OB-GYN at Orlando Health Winnie Palmer Hospital for Women & Babies.

“If the bleeding you’re having is because of a true period, meaning you ovulated 14 days ago, then there is no egg available to fertilize at that time,” she explained. “The problem with saying that you ‘cannot get pregnant on your period’ as a general statement? Sometimes women have bleeding not associated with a true period, and they may think they are getting a period, but that’s not actually the cause of bleeding.”

Infections, fibroids and hormone shifts can also cause you to spot or bleed at odd times in your menstrual cycle. It’s best to be on the safe side and use protection no matter what if you’re not trying to get pregnant.

Myth: You can’t get an STI if you use a condom.

You’ve likely heard that you should always use a condom to protect against sexually transmitted infections ― and yes, that is true. But you should still exercise caution: While condoms are highly effective in preventing STIs passed through bodily fluids, like gonorrhea or HIV, condoms are less effective in preventing infections contracted through skin-to-skin contact, like HPV or herpes, according to the American Sexual Health Association.

That being said, safe sex is still very possible with protection and communication. Condoms do offer some protection from skin-contact conditions, and should be used to prevent an array of STIs and unintended pregnancy. Also, although you’ve been hearing this suggestion repeated since sex ed, it still holds: Talk to your partner about condom use and STIs — or get tested before sex if that route makes you feel comfortable and safest.

Myth: It’s OK to fake an orgasm.

Faking orgasms is never a good idea, even if you’re trying to kindly preserve someone’s ego, said Sarah Hunter Murray, a sex researcher and relationship therapist.

“Orgasms and other signs that we are experiencing pleasure during sexual activity, like words of affirmation or moaning, are cues to our partner that they are doing something we like,” she said. “If sex isn’t feeling so good, but we pretend that we are enjoying ourselves, our partner is understandably going to keep doing the stuff we’re not that into.”

What to do instead? Be vocal. “Positively encourage behaviors that are actually satisfying ― or talk honestly about what’s not working as well,” Murray added.

Myth: You can’t get pregnant unless a man ejaculates during intercourse.

There are lots of urban legends out there about how exactly you can and cannot get pregnant when it comes to male-female sex, but let’s clear those up.

“One of the most widely believed myths is you won’t get pregnant if you pull out in time, but that isn’t the case,” said Dr. Mache Seibel, a health education expert. “Many times, the precum or pre-ejaculation spurts out ahead of the larger volume of semen,” but still contains some sperm, Seibel explained. It’s why the pull-out method ― or withdrawing before ejaculation ― sometimes fails.

Also, anytime sperm enters the vagina, “pregnancy is possible,” Seibel added, though “not nearly as likely” in the cases of indirect delivery, like say on a finger or vibrator. Concerned? Don’t rely on pulling out and be safe with birth control.

Myth: Women usually orgasm from penetration.