Being in a warm, caring, stable relationship is great. It's a wonderful feeling, being loved and having someone to love. But even when you're in a fulfilling relationship, all of us have days when we miss the single life. The time when we weren't answerable to anyone and our actions affected only ourselves. That twilight time when the parents have finally accepted that iss ladki ka kuch nahi hone waala and before the time we find a partner we see ourselves playing ghar-ghar with. Here are 15 things most Indian girls miss from their single life.
You meet your cousin's cute NRI devar with a thick, yummy British accent at a family function. Or your sister who doesn't yet know about your partner is trying to set you up with her classmate from medical college who is now a heart surgeon and basically saves lives for a living each day. Which normal, red-blooded woman would not want to flirt with such fine specimens of the male species? Before you know it, you're stalking them on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and Snapchat and speculating about how adorable and family-approved your babies are going to be. This, of course, is immediately followed by the crushing guilt over what a terrible girlfriend you are.
Being in a relationship is probably the worst thing that can happen to your lovingly curated book collection. So much of the time you used to spend reading will now be spent doing stuff with your partner. And every once in a while, you'll wistfully look at the growing stack of books you totally meant to read, but never got around to it.
Having only one family to deal with
It's tough enough being guilted by one set of parents complaining about not getting enough time with you, let alone two. Considering that your leave days were just enough to cover the weddings and illnesses within your own family, with just enough left over for a hurried vacation for yourself; managing commitments to two families in the same number of days is every working professional's nightmare. How do you not feel a twinge when you're spending a precious long weekend attending his cousin's wedding, when you could have been sipping a chilled beer on a beach in Goa instead?
Comfortable, ugly nightwear
When you're in a relationship, at least in the early days, you feel like you must put on visually appealing nightwear to keep the fires of lust raging. Even if you're not spending the night together, who amongst us hasn't heaved a sigh and quickly changed out of a seriously worn out Patiala salwar and holey, bobbing t-shirt and into a just-the-right-amount-of-transparent white unbuttoned shirt for the purposes of a midnight selfie? You really can't get fast enough to the stage where you've been together too long to notice things like misshapen nightwear and panties so large and loose, they could be mistaken for sofa covers. Pure bliss.
It's tough to give yourself permission to put yourself ahead of the other person in any relationship, but the feeling is that much more acute when you're in a relationship. Where to vacation? Go out or stay in on a Friday night? Which cuisine to order? No matter how great your relationship, every once in a while, you'll miss not having to think about anyone but yourself.
Doing gross stuff
There is something incredibly therapeutic about chewing on your fingernails, biting your cuticles, leaning really close to the mirror and scratching your scalp to look for dandruff, taking off your earrings and nose ring and inspecting them for lodged dirt, and all the other daily gross stuff we do. But when you're in a relationship, you have to always keep one eye on the door to make sure your partner doesn't walk in just as you're getting to the seriously gross, but cathartic, part. It's a crying shame, really.
Want to spend the weekend lazing around in the house, unshowered, stewing in your own filth? Hell, yeah. When you're single, there's no one giving you the judgemental side-eye for being disgusting.
While it's great to be a part of the adult world or real relationships where fights and arguments are resolved with mature discussions and trying to understand your partner's point of view, sometimes, we all want it to be as simple, clean and repercussion-free as un-matching and swiping ahead. You think Shah Rukh Khan is mediocre? Unmatched without a goodbye, sir.
The thrill of the first kiss
First kisses are awkward, overrated and mostly underwhelming. But every once in a while, they're magical. And when they are, the surge of lust is thrilling and makes you feel sexy, alive and alight. How can anyone not miss that?
Getting rid of body hair on a need-to basis
In an ideal world, we'd all be comfortable enough in our bodies to not feel the need to wax, shave, tweeze, thread, epilate, depilate, or do any of the other painful things we do to deny the existence of pores on our skin. But we aren't. And when you've newly started sleeping with someone, you spend an exhausting amount of time grooming. While thinking wistfully of the days when you allowed the armpit and leg hair grow wild and free because hey, who's looking? Even when you get comfortable in a relationship and body hair is no longer the horror it used to be, it's still never going to be the same when you know your limbs are going to be entwined with someone else's in the night.
Sleeping like the Vitruvian Man
If you've been lucky enough to not have to share a bed with a sibling or a roommate, sharing it with a partner will need a lot of adjustment. No more sprawling on the bed like the Vitruvian Man when half the bed belongs to someone you're supposed to want to share it with.
Just you and the sound of your thoughts. You can even pretend to not be home and not answer the doorbell for the milkman, the maid or the garbage collector. In a relationship, those days are hard to come by and need to be scheduled meticulously.
Time with your best friend
There was a time you and your best friends had enough time to keep each other updated on who was making ridiculous pre-wedding videos, who was outraging about what, and which Bollywood person was shagging which other Bollywood person. Things change when there's a partner in the picture. Between conflicting schedules and needing quality time with your partner, spontaneous plans with close friends become almost impossible. Sigh.
Not having to share your food
It might be cute and funny when Joey yells, "Joey doesn't share food" at his bewildered date in Friends, but in the real world, your partner would be seriously alarmed if you had such a visceral reaction to them poking in your plate.
Full control over Netflix
First, there are all the shows you love and he can't stand. Then there are the shows that you're waiting for him to catch up on so you're on the same season. And then there are those you promised not to watch without each other. Sometimes, you don't want to have to think so much before binge-watching Netflix.