There are days when you're primed for physics and gravity-defying calisthenics in the bedroom and others when you wish you could just sit back and be serviced. As enjoyable as sex is, it can require a LOT of effort. And sometimes, after you're done battling with traffic, dragon bosses, impossible deadlines, crying babies, casual sexism and the chaotic demands of everyday life, there's just no energy left to turn on the sexy. On days like those, you fall back on tried and tested sexual quick-fixes that make sure you're thoroughly taken care of despite minimum effort on your part. Don't have any? Here are 9 to help you weather those terrible days. You're welcome.
1. Use a sex toy
Sex toys are the perfect stand-ins for days when you want to get off in principle, but can't find the energy or the inclination to get into the mood. Lie back, bring out the vibrator and let it do the heavy-lifting for you. It's tough not to be turned on when an unyielding, thrumming vibrator is pressed against your clitoris, sending ripples of pleasure through your body. You can be self-indulgent and finish off on your own or invite your partner to join you once you're primed for action. But remember, don't get into the habit of replacing actual foreplay with the vibrator; it might get the job done but it's no substitute for the sense of intimacy that accompanies a partner's caresses and attempts at foreplay.
But remember, don't get into the habit of replacing actual foreplay with the vibrator
2. Watch some porn
Put on a porn flick and chill. Visual aids can be very helpful in getting you in the mood after a long, tiring day at work or a carb-induced food coma while your partner tries desperately to seduce you. You could use porn to give you a headstart or make it a joint project with your partner. Either way, indulging in consensual voyeurism every now and again is both, a great way to wake up a tired libido, and inject some excitement in your sexual routine.
3. Mutual masturbation
In every couple's life there are days when you want to get frisky but are just too tired or lazy to go all the way. This is the time when you masturbate together. What's the point of doing it together, when both partners are doing their own thing anyway? The point is intimacy, vulnerability and the knowledge that both partners are comfortable enough to masturbate around each other.
Masturbation is like the comfort food of the sex world—it's comfortable, comforting and you only have to think of yourself when you suddenly change pace.
Masturbation is like the comfort food of the sex world—it's comfortable, comforting and you only have to think of yourself when you suddenly change pace. Plus, it's super hot to simply lie back and watch your partner in the throes of pleasure. What's not to like?
4. Make it a quickie
The zipless fuck doesn't have to be cold, calculated and unemotional. Sometimes, a quickie is simply the most efficient use of limited reserves of energy, and time. Not to mention, it can be an incredible turn on, when both you and your partner are burning up for each other but aren't able to carve out time for hours-long sex sessions. Strictly speaking, you don't even need to undress for a quick tumble in the hay. Imagine rushing straight to work a few minutes after you've straddled your partner for some basic, rough action against your bedroom door. Hot, hot, hot.
5. Assisted missionary
In general, the missionary position is relatively easy on the woman, with the man doing most of the work as well as controlling the speed and depth of penetration. On days when you want to make it as easy as humanly possible, prop a pillow under your butt. It'll give your back and butt cushioning as well as elevation, increasing the depth of his thrusts, without any effort on your part. If you have the energy, rotate and grind your pelvis to increase his pleasure as well as your own. But even if you don't, assisted missionary feels pretty darn great on tired days.
On days when you want to make it as easy as humanly possible, prop a pillow under your butt.
6. Twist to doggy style
While doggy style may be more physically taxing than missionary, it's still a fairly comfortable sex position for women. But if the idea of going down on fours seems too tiring, you can try several variations of the doggy style. Lie face-down on the bed with only the upper half of the body on the bed and your legs wide apart and feet planted on the floor. It is an easy position for you as well as your partner because they won't need to exert as much upper body strength since they're thrusting from behind. Still feeling lazy? Try the flat doggy, where you lie completely on the bed, face down, but prop a few pillows under your hip to give your partner easier access for g-spot and clitoral stimulation as well as penetration from behind. Keep your legs tightly closed for a tighter fit.
7. Stick to oral
When penetration feels like too much work, use oral sex to take the edge off your want-an-orgasm-but-feeling-lethargic dilemma. Since most women can't orgasm through intercourse alone anyway, it's okay to leave that bit out once in a while. To make it easier on your partner, sit on the sofa or a comfortable chair with your partner on the floor so they can access your clit without too much effort.
When penetration feels like too much work, use oral sex to take the edge off your want-an-orgasm-but-feeling-lethargic dilemma
It's the most boring way to have sex, but it does get the job done. So we're not going to diss it, but we will say that use this position sparingly, reserved only for times of unprecedented laziness. Both you and your partner lie on your sides, your back to their chest.
It's the most boring way to have sex, but it does get the job done.
But instead of just cuddling, you lift your leg a little and make room for your partner to access your g-spot or even penetrate you from behind. This position also gives them unfettered access to your breasts and clitoris. Unexciting, but efficient.
9. Side by side
This is a lot like spooning, just that instead of facing the same direction, you and your partner lie on your sides, facing each other. Lift your leg so your partner can enter you. This position gives both partners equal access and if you're both feeling a little lazy, you can take turns controlling the pace. Side-by-side is a great position for partners who like to kiss and feel each other's chest and buttocks during sex.