Raising a toddler is a true test of patience, endurance, self-preservation and stain removal abilities. As a result, comedy is a welcome source of relief.
Many parents in the throes of toddler parenting share their hilarious observations on Twitter ― finding LOL-worthy humor in the chaos, messes and exchanges with these “tiny drunk people.”
We’ve rounded up 24 tweets that perfectly capture life with toddlers.
I didn't even know you could feel every single emotion in a 20 minute span until I put a toddler to bed.— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) October 14, 2014
Sometimes you're in awe of all the things your toddler has learned and other times you regret teaching them things like how to open doors.— Mamatoga (@Mamatoga) August 17, 2014
My 3 year old told the doctor that she liked eating her vegetables.— MommieKnowsfresh (@MommieKnwsFresh) March 31, 2016
And the academy award goes to....
My toddler screamed "HELP!" at 2am like she was being attacked because her blanket was tangled, so don't talk to me about your problems.— Goodnight Sanity (@GoodnightSanity) May 12, 2016
We're really into juice cleanses lately, it's when ur toddler spills apple juice all over the house and u follow her around with a wet rag.— Lurk @ Home Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) May 16, 2016
Apparently a 2 year old getting her hair washed and an exorcism sound oddly similar.— Shock Jacques (@jnyemb) March 30, 2014
I've taught this toddler to say 'please,' a word he thinks means 'I command you to do this.'— John Fugelsang (@JohnFugelsang) May 8, 2016
I told my toddler to sit on the training potty.— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) May 13, 2016
I came upstairs to find this
She outsourced going to the bathroom. pic.twitter.com/S97ua21kTB
If you pretend toddlers are speaking Dothraki they're a lot more entertaining.— Valerie (@ValeeGrrl) May 28, 2016
My toddler has created "karate ballet"— MommieKnowsfresh (@MommieKnwsFresh) April 13, 2016
and I'm scared for us all...
The 3yo insisted on helping me put all the laundry away. It's only taken us 6 hours & 10 minutes & apparently pants go in the fridge now.— Jennifer Lizza (@outsmartedmommy) May 11, 2015
Fun fact: If you take the fluffy pad off a Swiffer, it becomes a pitchfork for a toddler to attack you with.— Unfiltered Mama (@UnfilteredMama) May 7, 2016
You could make dinner for a toddler, or you could just cut out the middle man & throw away a plate of food and squirt ketchup on the dog.— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) September 12, 2014
3-year-old: *pouts*— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) May 2, 2016
Me: Is something wrong with your lunch?
3: It's too wet.
Me: It's soup.
No one exaggerates a situation quite like a toddler who just broke their cookie.— Jennifer Lizza (@outsmartedmommy) May 5, 2016
So The Fast and the Furious isn't about grocery shopping with your toddler?— Meredith (@PerfectPending) May 2, 2016
So nice of my 3yo to crawl into bed at 6:15 so she could kick me in the back and fart on me. #mondays— Will (@willgoldstein) January 11, 2016
The mind of a 3 year old is a scary place. pic.twitter.com/eT3N598ajl— Shock Jacques (@jnyemb) July 12, 2015
If only we could harness the renewable energy of toddler tantrums.— Charlie N Andy (@HowToBeADad) March 6, 2014
Thank you toddler for "helping me with dinner" by doing the vital task of unraveling the entire tinfoil roll. pic.twitter.com/7cSGGAtTte— mama bird diaries (@mamabirddiaries) April 28, 2016
Growing up I used to be afraid of the dark but now I am afraid of hearing my toddler wake up in the middle of the night.— Tired Working Mom (@WorkingMom86) February 11, 2016
Just discovered why my dishes weren't getting clean... Caught my toddler pressing cancel mid-wash.— Jennifer Borget (@JenniferBorget) April 10, 2015
A toddler can do more in one unsupervised minute than most people can do all day.— mama bird diaries (@mamabirddiaries) May 12, 2016