When It's Time To Parent A Parent

18/09/2015 8:27 AM IST | Updated 15/07/2016 8:25 AM IST
Looks Beautiful in Large! Press L to see in Large & Black Press F to Fave :) Follow me @ My Blog | Google+ | Twitter | Facebook | Instagram Project Grandma – This is Kamatchi A.K.A Ammalam Patti A.K.A Viboodhi Paati, my 86 yr old grandmother. I have been wanting to do this project for the past few years but i was unable to do it due to my busy schedule. My grandma suddenly became very weak last week and I finally decided to do this project because I may not get another chance if I leave it for too late. Most of us miss to notice/admire the beauty of our grandparents due to our busy schedules. We all admire them in their younger age photos but miss to capture the beauty of their old age. Only after I took these photos, I myself understood her real self. I was shocked to see how old she has become and these photos made me realize that she is on her way to the lord, but only the Lord knows when. My intention was not to hurt the feelings of my family members but i wanted to show my family that my grandmother has really grown old. My intention was to click some honest portraits of my grandma to show her physical and emotional details which most of us fail to notice everyday. When I showed these pics to my mom and a few of my family people, they burst into tears. I think that is natural and am sorry. My grandmother has seen all the good and bad in her life and is still going on strong. Yes! She wants to live more after all the happiness and suffering she got in this material life. She married my grandfather and gave birth to 9 children. When we all struggle to maintain one or two children, imagine how much pain she would have gone through to bring up all these children especially when few of them were really cranky . My grandfather worked in a shipping company as a caterer and so he would be available only for 6 months in a year to help her. It was my grandma all the way. She was a powerful personality and was a queen at her prime age. She managed to give a decent education to most of her children. She did all she could do to give a good life to her kids. She might have hurt a few and she might have been good to a few but she has been always a loving grandmother in my perspective and I cherish all the moments i had spent with her in my whole life. My mom and I have always been the pet of my grandmother and would love to always be like that. She is going to be with us only for some time so for me, my mom and my family members, now is the time to remember all the good things about her, now is the time to be very supportive to her and now is the time to buy her what she loves – Chocolates & Sweets. Love You Paati!!! I hope these photos will inspire everybody to click many pics of your grandparents and more importantly show lots of love to them. Remember they have shown their unconditional love to us and it’s our turn now. Let’s not be selfish by leaving them behind when they want us the most.

Where do I begin? I didn't know until last morning that this subject would rise to my consciousness. A small emergency in your family, and it's as if somebody wakes you up from deep slumber.

Yes, slumber. Because that's the state you are in if something's right in front of you but you've been too preoccupied to realise it.

We tend to feel that old people being moved to old age homes are the only ones who are in need of our service. But the truth is, old people in our own homes, grandparents or parents, also need our attention once they cross a particular age.

As we move from one decade to another, we are getting more educated and more exposed, more tech-savvy and more advanced. But that's also making us busier and self-centred. I don't really mean selfish. We may have noble intentions and we may be good at heart. But in this race that life has become today, in our hurry to reach our destination, we are missing very important facets of the journey. And one such utmost important aspect is finding time for your own parents. Spending time with them is very important, yes. But being around them and for them is all the more essential.

In a developing country like India, many men and women who became proud parents in the 70s and 80s are living all by themselves, in the sunset of their life. This generation especially was one which never really did anything to please themselves. They spent a major part of their lives obeying their parents and are spending the rest listening to their children. They spent their whole life tending to their previous generation and providing for their next one. They toiled hard night and day, and made their children capable of flying high. They paved the way for their children's bright future and better lifestyle, while sacrificing their own dreams and aspirations. Today, so many children of this generation are well-educated and well-off.

The children wanted to fly so they gave them wings. But once the little one flew away from the nest, the parent was left behind, all alone. The child got busy, with his life, his dreams, maybe also his children. Oh no, this child is not a bad one either. He loves his parents, misses them, looks out for them, but from a distance. Career or spouse, the reasons may vary, but the outcome is the same. Lonely parents.

Our parents, who held our fingers and taught us how to walk. Our parents who taught us how to talk. Our parents, who stayed up all night taking care of us when we were sick. Our parents who for our smile came up with every trick.

At an age, where they are tired, truly exhausted, due to all the hard work they've put in for their family all their life, all they need is a hand. They need us, our presence and our support.

All of us want happiness for our parents. All of us mean well. It's just that we tend to forget, that their biggest source of happiness is us. And however much they may want us around, they love us too much to confess it. So friends, as you pave your way forward in this world, be sure to look back and hold hands of the ones who brought you here in the first place.

It is time indeed to parent your parent.

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