Since childhood, we are taught to love and care for each other. We are raised in an environment where we grow attached to our loved ones. We learn to share happiness as well as pain. Gradually, we feel proud sharing a relationship of pain with our dear ones. And so, it becomes difficult to imagine our lives without them. But is it really a healthy relationship? I mean, if we feel sad because another person is sad, the exchange of energy that we have with them is negative.
Here, the realization of “me” becomes important. Although, people misinterpret the concept of being ‘self oriented’ with being ‘selfish’, there is a significant disparity between the two. While being selfish is a negative trait, being self oriented is a prudent trait.
One should learn to be independent for his own pleasure and discomfort. The dependencies should be eliminated. The much intricate it sounds, easier it is to execute but the accomplishment needs practice. There are times in our lives where we are scared of losing people; we are afraid of them going away from us. We have learnt to accept this feeling as ‘attachment/love/habit’. But isn’t it true that the fear is not what will happen to them, the fear is what will happen to me, if anything happens to them. The apprehension is that I have not conquered the art of letting go and so I am not prepared for it.
We all have certain responsibilities towards each other and that we are bound by our heart and mind to fulfill them whether we are ready for it or not. We refuse to take a stand for our own happiness because of the inherent belief in us convinces us that my happiness is dependent on others. And that if I think about myself, I might be acting selfish.
We need to let go off such apprehensions. We need to comprehend the difference between being self-oriented and being self-obsessed. And maybe then, we actually start caring for people not just out of the societal norms but out of the love that exists amidst.
And maybe then, we actually justify the relation of the word “independence” with ourselves.
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