Works in a multinational company as Lead, Social Learning, she did her schooling in Carmel, Dhanbad and La Martiniere for Girls, Kolkata. She chose English Literature as her subject for higher studies and lived in Cambridge, UK, for around 10 years before coming back and living in Kolkata. She is married and has a 16 year old son.
Never believe anyone who says no kid is born bad. They don't have a clue. The nicest of parents, who get enough sleep and are in full emotional control and work hard at parenting, get the rottenest kids. There will come a point when the twerp whose bottom you wiped a million times, who managed to do targeted projectile vomiting on you and your most expensive dress, whose snot you have cleared using your own hands will tell you to get a life.
My son was born at 30 weeks. I felt nothing when the nurse brought this little lizard-like character wrapped in a towel to me. Instead of being overwhelmed by love, I distinctly remember thinking, “Oh my god! He is such a scrawny ugly little thing. What a waste of six months of throwing up good food!” For days when he was in the NICU and I was in my bed two wards down, I went to see him only because the nurses asked me to…
I feel a pervasive sense of helplessness, of danger, of responsibility, a sense of guilt and unreality. It is as though our earth has shifted on its axis and something unfathomable has occurred in the galaxy in which I live. Even as I realise that, I know his confusion must be so much more. It is a whole new world to him -- in an awful, confusing way, he must be in a city where the street signs are missing.
When I told my mother, that fateful morning, that her son was dead, she fell in a heap, as though she imploded. She hit her head as she fell, but I just walked by her and went to drink some water, leaving her lying there for the relatives to pick up. Was I unnatural? Maybe. When I see Nupur Talwar's face and the steely determination in it, I know where that comes from. From a need to act normal when nothing around is.
I have a fridge magnet which says: "There is no such thing as a non-working mother". But try being a mother who has a full-time job outside the home as well. And while your male colleagues will always tell you that it is all about time/stress management, I can guarantee you at least 80% of them go home to get ready-made tea, meals and welcome hugs from nicely bathed, cute children.