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When 'Moving On' Can Hold You Back

22/12/2015 2:43 PM IST | Updated 15/07/2016 8:25 AM IST
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There exists a world as seen by us. Each of us is a minuscule part of that world, and we are all struggling. We think about hardships, relationships, unfulfilled aims and many other things which in some way or the other are not acceptable to us, but still we live with them and carry on, accepting that some things will never change.

But our world doesn't end there. Inside of us exists another world, a world larger than the one outside. In this inner world, our thoughts are felt in a deeper way. It's a world where pessimistic thoughts give way to the hope that there will be better days if we only wait for them. This is the world of hope and patience.

Can we really forget that past which we once thought held the key to our future?

We are a part of a fast-paced and dynamic ecosystem where our wishes are fulfilled through a mere touch of a smartphone screen. Our relationships are public property, to be "shared" with friends and strangers. Often times, love begins, progresses and even ends on social networking sites. We hardly have the time to think about what went wrong or how to make amends or learn from mistakes. The mantra is to "move on" and forget all about past experiences.

But is it truly possible for us to move on from each and every action, aim, past, guilt or regret?

Can we really forget that past which we once thought held the key to our future?

The answer is NO. It is not possible.

The striking thing about humans is that we never grow up. Our looks change, expressions change, habits change but one thing remains the same. It's our heart. At 25, our heart is just the way it was when we were five. A five-year-old child cries for whatever it is he wants, regardless of how realistic it is to expect that wish to be fulfilled. All the child knows is that something felt good and it must be had. Twenty years on from then, nothing changes. We crave for things, for people whom we love but are far from us. We try to grasp at them and when they slip away, we feel very low even if we don't show it. We tend to move on superficially, but our heart seldom keeps up.

Similar things happen when we are in love. We have good days in love to cherish and bad days to regret. There are times when we feel stuck in circumstances and patterns of behaviour and things refuse to go the way we want. We don't know what to do. In such situations we can only wait and hope for things to get back on track.

But after a while we start to lose hope. Our patience disappears. And we give up. It is difficult, it is painful, it is harsh to give up on something which we actually loved and desperately wanted. We start acting as if we have left the love behind and we are just fine. But the fact is we are not. Inside us, the wish for this love to return continues to linger.

So if we can't let go of someone or something in our minds, why do we abandon all hope of actually getting them?

What we fail to realise in such scenarios is that there are things which take time. Certain phases do change, many people do come around, and many times things definitely move in our direction -- if not now, then later. Never ever regret your past, and if it is worth regretting, then never let it be your past.

Never ever regret your past, and if it is worth regretting, then never let it be your past.

To move on, to give up, to succumb to exhaustion will never give us what we truly want. We craved, we tried, we waited, we even prayed... and then what? We stopped hoping, we stopped waiting, and yet certain desires stayed even as others came and were lost.

Why not be patient and hope?

The world never belonged to the people who ran fast and jumped from one thing to another because the first attempt took too much time. The world always belonged to the people who trusted their love, their belief in their work, waited patiently and saw what was wrong with what they were doing, made changes and continued to improve instead of changing their beliefs and aims. That's what made them reach their highs.

Our life is based on the hope of survival. We don't know how long we will be alive, but still we breathe. Still we hope to live long, we have the patience to wait until it all ends. We think, act and take measures, but in the end hope and patience are integral parts of whatever we do.

Don't let the hope in you die, don't let the patience slip away.

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