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You Won't Believe What This Girl Did With Her Poop On A Date

Oh Crap! You Won't Believe What This Girl Did With Her Poop On A Date
_blotty /Twitter

On Tuesday morning, a Twitter user @_blotty from Toronto shared her poop story while she was on a date with her boyfriend and it's hilarious.

Everyone has a poop story.

I have a story to tell. It is about my poop

— misunderstood worm (@_blotty) March 22, 2016

Very romantic.

So, yesterday I went on a date with a man who asked me out in the grocery store the other day. All was going well. I went back to his place

— misunderstood worm (@_blotty) March 22, 2016

Oh, crap!

I am a confident, calm and self assured woman...so I felt comfortable popping in his bathroom. This was a mistake. His toilet did not flush

— misunderstood worm (@_blotty) March 22, 2016

You're a fighter!

Properly. So, of course, like any calm, confident, self assured woman. I panicked. And flushed it a million times, making everything worse

— misunderstood worm (@_blotty) March 22, 2016

No wait!

By this point, I was really frantic because I had been in there for too long. There was only one single piece of poop. So in that moment

— misunderstood worm (@_blotty) March 22, 2016

Noo!

Something came over me. And I knew exactly what I had to do. I got toilet paper and removed the one poop from the toilet. Once that was done

— misunderstood worm (@_blotty) March 22, 2016

I realized I didn't have a plan. What do I do with it now? I can't fucking leave it there. By this point I was REALLY freaking out because

— misunderstood worm (@_blotty) March 22, 2016

I'd DEFINITELY been in there too long. So, again, making another horrible decision. I did the only thing I could think to do. I wrapped it

— misunderstood worm (@_blotty) March 22, 2016

Holy shit!

In multiple layers of toilet paper, and put it in my purse

— misunderstood worm (@_blotty) March 22, 2016

Same.

Alright, so now what? We are sitting there on his couch and kissing and all I can think of is the piece of poop in my purse

— misunderstood worm (@_blotty) March 22, 2016

Her sense of humour smells great.

Him: you're so beautiful. The moment you smiled at me,u had me

Me: that's really sweet

Me in my head: I have a piece of my poo in my purse

— misunderstood worm (@_blotty) March 22, 2016

Family always to the rescue.

At this point, I text my sister for advice pic.twitter.com/lMeX55iiH4

— misunderstood worm (@_blotty) March 22, 2016

No risks, no glory!

So, after a few hours he used the washroom and I heard it flush. I figured he fixed it. Maybe not, but I have to take the chance. I hAve to

— misunderstood worm (@_blotty) March 22, 2016

You go girl!

Try to flush the poop. So I brought my purse up to the washroom. Unwrapped the poop, prayed to every god I know, put it in and flushed

— misunderstood worm (@_blotty) March 22, 2016

Sweeeeeet.

By the grace of God, it worked. The poo flushed. I was free. I was in the clear. Everything was going to be okay. I survived.I am a survivor

— misunderstood worm (@_blotty) March 22, 2016

You're a winner.

So that's my story. A man, sat there telling me I'm the most amazing woman he's ever met, not knowing, 10 feet away in my purse, was my poop

— misunderstood worm (@_blotty) March 22, 2016

Mission Impossible 7.

That I'd fished out of his toilet...

— misunderstood worm (@_blotty) March 22, 2016

Kudos for sharing.

This is v embarrassing for me. But seriously: dont drink coffee before a date, its better to be sleepy than to have to hide poop in ur purse

— misunderstood worm (@_blotty) March 22, 2016

Brave Poop girl instead.

Wow. All of the hard work I put into being a hot girl is tarnished by one teeny tiny poop story. Now I'm just the poop girl

— misunderstood worm (@_blotty) March 22, 2016

Aaaaaand. People loved her story.

@_blotty i am in tears 😭😭😭 ur so great

— Hantai (@supsuphannah) March 22, 2016

@_blotty ok this just filled some empty part of me I didn't know I had, God bless

— buhhh (@butt_sword) March 22, 2016

Truly a braveheart.

@_blotty thank you. This makes me feel so relieved. I was afraid for you, but you pulled through

— B Cavello (@b_cavello) March 22, 2016

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This article exists as part of the online archive for HuffPost India, which closed in 2020. Some features are no longer enabled. If you have questions or concerns about this article, please contact indiasupport@huffpost.com.