On CBSE Exam Result Day, Comedian Vir Das Has Important Stuff To Say About Marks And Life

25/05/2015 2:47 PM IST | Updated 15/07/2016 8:25 AM IST

The CBSE Class 12 results were declared on Monday and predictably, there is both a sense of relief and uncertainty among students who will now chalk out their career path after their boards.

But for those students despairing that their marks are not enough to guarantee them places in colleges of their choice, comedian Vir Das has excellent advice on marks, exams and life in general.

Das said he wrote the sketch for kids and parents out there who are waiting for the dreaded Board Exam results.

Here's the full text of what he said.

Are you ready? Are you paying attention? The minute this video ends…you begin.

You may get into the big college of your dreams or get into a college that makes you get out of college with really big dreams.

Your body is finally a body and you're gonna look at that body and work on that body look for some body who works to put next to that body.

You're gonna read stuff you never heard of before or you're hear stuff that you're never gonna read or you'll write the stuff everyones gonna read because they heard about you. .

You're gonna leave your parents who took care of you only to realise that they took care of you and that you left them till you leave whatever your taking care of to take care of your parents.

You're gonna have a little sex which is a big deal and its gonna be really good and you probably wont be very good at it at it until you have a lot of sex and get good at it to discover that its not a big deal at all and its all good.

You're gonna meet someone, go looking for someone or just be waiting for someone and the person you were waiting for will never be the person you were looking at or ever thought you'd meet.

You're gonna fall in love and your hearts gonna get broken or you're gonna break someone's heart because you hadn't fallen in love yet.

You're gonna lose all your money which will make you lose mind until you make your mind up to make some money and forever mind your money.

You're gonna drink, smoke, dance, run which will make you vomit, choke, faint and pant until you eventually savour, talk, groove and chill.

You're gonna arrange your own wedding to someone else or be in your own wedding that someone else arranged.

You're gonna get hired and fired and both will just give you a fire to go higher.

You're gonna hold your baby and contemplate the meaning of life, you're gonna hold someone else's baby and contemplate death.

You're gonna fight for each other and with each other and she’ll win…and you'll lose because when she wins you win with nothing to lose.

You're gonna yourself buy things from other people and then discover that buying things for other people gets you better things from other people.

You'll meet lots of new friends who will give you lots of new reasons to love the old ones.

You will beg, borrow, steal so that eventually you can risk, rent and lose so that maybe you can own, invest and grow.

You will talk shit, take shit, give shit, eat shit until you don’t give a shit because you think you’re the shit.

Now what do all of these things have in common? None of them, none of them, none of them…..require a mark sheet.

Are you ready? The minute this Video ends…you begin.

On your Marks, screw your marks….GO.

If you're still not convinced, then these Twitter users have more advice for you.

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